Why We Watch - 2008 Cincinnati Reds

February 28th, 2008 by Tuffy Posted in baseball, mlb, why we watch |

There’s 200 days or so of baseball to come this season and it can be quite intimidating to jump into the deep end of the baseball viewing pool.

To help, Refrigerator Logic is providing a list of reasons to watch every Major League Baseball team for the 2008 season. Anyone that’s read all the team lists should be able to pull up the MLB schedule on any day in early June and find reasons to enjoy any contest on the board that night.

Please join in the comments to add your own reasons. Tell everyone why your team is worth three and a half hours of their lives on any given day. Make us care and we’ll be there with a tasty beverage and an appreciation for what you feel each time your team takes the field.

You Do What You Do, Right?

Dusty Baker could not be more of a known quantity if he were defined by wavelengths of the orange-red line. He’s precisely what you expect when you hire him: he hates anything invented or discovered before he turned 35. He believes runs are driven in through burly effort, not a result of having men on base. He believes young pitchers were placed on this earth for him to bury mercilessly. He has a keen understanding of genetics. As Christina Kahrl points out repeatedly at Baseball Prospectus, he knows how to use his son as a human shield at press conferences.

He’ll change course only after ramming into the brick wall a few times. He will always favor the older man, single-handedly turning back age discrimination trends in America. He enjoys long walks in the park as long as they’re not with his batters. He’ll happily admit wrong as long as it’s yours.

And, hey, he’s great for a quote and/or an ejection. That’s quality viewing, right?

That’s Right - You’re Parsley

Josh Fogg pitched another 165 innings for Colorado in 2007 and offered up an ERA around 5 for the sixth consecutive season. He provided his typical 5.2 innings per game. If you were told he ate dinner at 4:47 pm every day and always had the same number of peas on his plate for salisbury steak night, you could believe it. He is as regular and as ordinary as Tuesday afternoon’s budget meeting.

And yet he pitched his best baseball of his career in the 2007 postseason, battling Brandon Webb and Curt Schilling to a standstill. He became a part of Rockies folklore with his sudden decency, rising from mere competence.

So what is the reward for Josh Fogg after four full years for the Pittsburgh Pirates and two years pitching at a mile high? A year at Pitcher Crushing Field at two and a half times the minimum salary for a manager famous for leaving his duelers in three batters too long.

You’re a tribute to the true baseball fan, just plugging along until the pension kicks in and only occasionally being noticed. We salute you, Josh Fogg, and this strychnine is for you. Claim it whenever you please. Until then, we’ll tune in to cheer you on, mostly out of pity.

There’s Always Another Girl

Of course, the Josh Fogg Experience is only stopping in Cincinnati for 2008 to buy time for the youngsters to arrive. In this case, Reds fans and baseball viewers have a lot to look forward to this season. Three young Reds will make their full season debuts at some point this spring or summer, depending on how much roster shenanigans GM Wayne Krivsky is willing to try with his young charges to keep them from getting expensive for one more year:

• Jay Bruce - Consensus top prospect in baseball. Plays center field right now, currently being kept warm by Ryan Freel, who only seems to play like a possessed man. He hits home runs and takes walks. He covers a mean center field and works hard to stay that way. He smiles a lot, thanks his momma for her hard work, and will kiss your baby for an extraordinarily low fee. Really, he’s appointment television in 2008 whenever his appointment is scheduled. (Refrigerator Logic’s money is on June 2nd; start your own pool now.)
• Homer Bailey -A lingering groin pull helped this flamethrower with the nasty power curve slip off the Zeitgeist Doppler 3000 last season, but he’s still the likely true striker ace for the next successful Reds squad. Assuming he’s well and confident this year, there’s only one question for you: do you want to go… faster?
• Joey Votto - Assuming Dusty doesn’t fall in love with one of the fellows from the nearby retirement village in spring training because he brought his own glove and can remember when Dusty could really swing that pine, look for this chunk of home run power to be filling out the middle of the order in a quite flattering manner this summer.

Those fellows ought to match nicely with Arroyo, Harang, and the terminally underrated Brandon Phillips in a year or two, non?

Fun? Who Promised You Fun? We Get Paid, Remember?

It appears for all the world that Adam Dunn is finished in Cincinnati this season. Completed. Kaput. Fin. No, no… that’s not quite it. Certainly some headline writer will think of the proper word come July and the trading deadline.

Adam Dunn has only been able to get on base 38% of the time in his seven seasons in Cincinnati and bopping out a mere 238 home runs before turning 28 last winter. Therefore, it’s understandable why the Reds have been so anxious to please its fans and move on.

If you like efficient offensive machines in home run parks, you could dial up a Reds game to see Adam Dunn smash. Better hurry, though; this offer expires soon.

So, Make Any Resolutions?

This is Ken Griffey, Jr.’s last season on his contract.

Go ahead. Take a moment. It’s understandable.

When Griffey signed the massive deal in February 2000, the press exalted the “hometown” deal for the native Ohioan. As he exits the contract this year (barring a baffling pickup of his $16.5m 2009 option by Reds management), a weary nation lets free a tiny sigh of relief. After all, 105 games per season for eight years of questionable conditioning and devolving results have left a bad taste in the mouths of everyone not eating on Griffey’s dime.

However, the contract size and the cold taffy brittleness of his hamstrings have masked Griffey’s late-career desire to accomplish just a bit more before he shuffles off this active player coil. Therefore, on behalf of the Griffey family and our friends at Nike and with the inspiration from Matt Sussman, we are proud to present…

The Ken Griffey, Jr. Bucket List

• Get adamantium laced through all his bones just like Hugh Jackman in those X-Men movies
• Prepare new Nike line of corrective shoes
• Run for President now that he’s finally eligible
• Call up ProStars and see if they need a fourth
• Tattoo of Lou Piniella on his ankle
• Star in an international buddy flick with Nicholas Tse
• Try using his 500 home run club card to get a discount at Medieval Times
• Visit Paris
• See all the major league parks on the Reds’ schedule this summer with a bunch of his buddies from the Reds’ roster
• Finish building the shelf for all of his framed MRIs
• Travel back in time and take a swing at Rob Reiner’s ankle, preventing him from making The Bucket List. Oh, and North, too
• Have Darren Baker work with Trey Griffey on bat boy duties
• Stretch
• World Series ring (if time)