Weighty Problem with NBA Coaches

June 5th, 2008 by Tuffy Posted in basketball, nba, nonsense |

Color us dense, but we noticed something recently on Pro Basketball Reference while researching The Fall of Flip that we found rather striking: Flip Saunders has a height and weight listing under his coaching profile.  (5′11″, 175 lbs. for those of you counting at home.)  We couldn’t believe it.  This is important information about the coach?  Is there a weigh-in day for coaches where George Karl strips to his boxers and wiggles onto the scale?  (”Okay… minus the 12 oz of Schlitz in his hand, he’s 6′2″, 185 lbs.… George, put the other foot on the scale.  Seriously.”)

We kept checking randomly.  Only some coaches have measurements.  Allan Bristow, Kevin Loughery, John Lucas, Bill Fitch - yes.  Frank McGuire and Jim Boylan - no.  Okay, we figured: it’s bleeding through from their player profiles when they were pros.  Except, of course, Fitch and Saunders never played in the pros.  So maybe college stats?  But why track college stats of men that never played in the pros? We’re not sure.

Until someone proves otherwise, though, we will assume now that there is a head coach weigh-in day in the NBA and that’s the day that Jeff Van Gundy (5′9″, 150 lbs.) called in sick each year.  (”Sorry, Jeff… the only way the scale can detect you’re there is if we weigh you while you hang from Alonzo Mourning’s leg and then weigh him separately.  Oh… oh, stop crying, Jeff.  It’s okay.  You’re the Knicks’ big boy!  Yes, you are!”)