Cheez Doodle Dust and Chattering Classes

April 28th, 2008 by Tuffy

From Adrian Wojnarowski’s column at Yahoo! Sports:

Whatever (Josh) Howard’s take (on marijuana use in the NBA), he didn’t need to breathe life into a week-old newspaper story that no one noticed by volunteering to on the radio and make matters worse within hours of Game 3. Of course, one of ESPN’s NBA house organs was calling the game, chastising Howard for dragging other NBA players into the story.

Quite frankly, I love what he’s done here.

(Okay, mostly taking two days off.  Mostly.)

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Poor Troy Vincent Donahue Von Doom

April 26th, 2008 by Tuffy

Poor Troy Vincent can’t get a job in two sports.

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Nipsey F. Russell!

March 15th, 2008 by Tuffy

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This wager will be major!

March 15th, 2008 by Tuffy

Against my better judgment and the judgment of my lawyers, I’ve gone and Booked It at The Basketball Jones tonight. If I succeed in my pick, I pick tomorrow and again until I finally pick incorrectly. Since it’s my first time Booking, I asked for some help from a friend.

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Wish me luck!

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This is bad, Larry. Very bad.

March 9th, 2008 by Tuffy

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JUST KEEP SHOOTING
JUST KEEP SHOOTING
JUST KEEP SHOOTING SHOOTING SHOOTING

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AP Writers with a Sense of Humor

February 28th, 2008 by Tuffy

Conseco Fieldhouse on beautiful Lake Shafer!

Please to be enjoying an AP writer with likely Cleveland ties working the long season in his or her own way, thankyouverymuch:

“I’m happy with (the trade to the Bulls),” (Larry Hughes) said. “We did a lot of winning in Cleveland and I gained a lot of good experience, but I was definitely ready for a change. I like the position I’m in now.”

Yes, it is indeed better to exchange all that winning experience for a new position.

Pacers guard Travis Diener wasn’t surprised by Hughes’ big night.

“He’s a good player,” Diener said. “There’s a reason he has a big contract. They don’t just throw money away to (bad) players.”

Please excuse Travis; the Pacers haven’t played the Knicks since February 6th.

Mike Dunleavy had 25 points, Diener scored 22 and Troy Murphy chipped in 19…

Hahahahhahahaahhaha… that’s great. How ridiculous would it really be if… oh. Really? Wow. Maybe there is just corn in Indiana.

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Big Baby Vogue

February 10th, 2008 by Tuffy

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C’mon, ABC. Clearly, Glen Davis was having a pretty serious allergy attack that day. Why not let him try again? Clearly, he knows how to pose for a picture:

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Even a casual photo would be better:

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After all, you don’t want to make him mad. It takes a lot to stop him.

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NBA Trade Deadline Ideas (Early!)

February 8th, 2008 by Tuffy

Today in Tuffy History: I make trade suggestions for every NBA team. Most of them will probably bring federal investigations or, worse, the ire of David Stern. That’s how you know they’re good!

Also, tune into Treehouse Fort tonight to how Matt from Blog-a-Bull reacts to my trade ideas and the NBA season thus far. (Don’t tell him, but it’s actually an intervention.)

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Steve Kerr and the Shaq Question

February 6th, 2008 by Tuffy

sabonis_2.jpgThe revolution is over. Thanks for coming by. Please turn your pamphlets in at the door on the way out. You can keep your T-shirts with Don Nelson in a beret and wispy facial hair with the revolution’s thanks.

Suns President of Basketball Operations, General Manager, and General Secretary Steve Kerr has looked over the Suns’ roster and salary cap situation quite thoroughly and determined there is no way the team with the best record in the conference can win a championship as currently constituted. The solution? Shaquille O’Neal for Shawn Marion (and Marcus Banks), naturally.

No, Kerr does not have access to a time machine. No, there’s no recent advances in speed cloning. Yes, Kerr likely still has all of his faculties.

In fact, Steve Kerr is still the thoughtful, intelligent, and reasoned human being that took the job less than a year ago. He is capable of comprehending the world through others’ points of view and is not trapped in a traditional mindset.

With these assumptions in place, there is merely one question to address: what the hell? Read the rest of this entry »

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Strangers in the Night (Exchanging Teammates)

February 5th, 2008 by Tuffy

3192s75q42l_aa280_.jpgTwo ships on opposite coasts pass in the night in beautiful East Rutherford, NJ, on Tuesday as the Nets and Lakers clas… mee.. as the Lakers arrive to collect the Nets’ lunch money without much of a tussle. It will likely be the first appearance by the newest Laker, Pau Gasol, acquired in a trade last week with the moribund Memphis Grizzlies. (If the Lakers had thrown in Derek Fisher as well, Grizzlies owner Michael Heisley probably would have let the Lakers keep the entire franchise as a D-League team.)

Of course, Kobe Bryant (the best player/general manager since Larry Bi… Elgin Ba… Michael Jordan) fought to have Kidd join the Lakers via trade last season to little effect. At that point, it appeared the only way to reach Lakers GM Mitch Kupchak was through seance. Kobe thrashed about like a trapped black mamba (or spoiled child, depending on your opinion of the snake), demanding a better team in Los Angeles or elsewhere.

After a year of teasing Los Angeles and Chicago with his daily much ados, he ended up stuck on possibly the best team in the Western Conference with a power forward adept at the triangle and uniquely suited for the cosmopolitan Los Angeles lifestyle. Oh, and the best young center in the NBA without a sticker dunk in his repertoire.

Across the court, the Nets are still a bit behind the Lakers in their evolution. Jason Kidd wants out; Richard Jefferson wants to schedule time on the trainer’s table; Vince Carter wants whatever that lady in the front row is having.

As much as new player/GM LeBron James wants Jason Kidd, it’s worth noting that Kidd’s shooting percentage (never truly stellar) now matches that of the Apple Dumpling Gang. Therefore, Nets Grand Poobah Rod Thorn really doesn’t have many options on a final resting place for Kidd’s rapidly deteriorating game and $20m/per for the next 1.5 seasons.

Considering the rebirth of the fortunes of Danny Ainge and Mitch Kupchak, Nets fans may be forced to give Thorn the patience and trust they demand of the players towards the same franchise while he window shops a bit longer for the best fit left for Kidd, even if it means keeping the salary dump for the Nets after next season.

It’s likely Kidd would rather not see himself as an expiring contract, but that might be Thorn’s only option over the summer or next winter. A team in the Grizzlies’ position next season (though perhaps with one more owner than the Grizzlies seem to have) might take on the salary with little concern about who receives the checks as long as the salary cap room can be achieved. (A properly run Knicks organization, perhaps?)

Those that disagree with the current utility of Jason Kidd can be heard to exclaim that he may not be in his prime, but “he’s still Jason Kidd!”. Fair enough; his birth certificate can probably verify this. However, along those lines, Jerry West is still Jerry West and is quite available. Still, there doesn’t seem to be an NBA franchise that believes West could carry them to the NBA Finals as a point guard or a general manager these days.

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